If you were one of the over 100 million sports fans who watched the Super Bowl last weekend, you witnessed the greatest comeback in that game’s storied 51-year history. It was gripping drama (albeit agonizing for me and my fellow Atlanta Falcon’s fans). Let’s face it – everyone loves a good comeback story. Especially when it’s personal.
I should know. I engineered a pretty amazing comeback of my own after having lost my marriage, family and job to a lifelong struggle with habitual sexual sin that had escalated into a full-blown sexual addiction. Even though the odds were stacked against me, I fought back and am now blessed to be living a redemptive life totally free from that addiction. Which begs the question – how do you make a comeback?
20 years ago, I discovered I had a big problem. I had a porn problem that had escalated into a full-blown sexual addiction. That addiction cost me my 15-year marriage, my family, my job, and a whole lot more. About a year after my divorce, I decided to quit porn. I’ve been sexually sober now for almost 20 years!
But about 10 years ago, I discovered I had another big problem. I realized I’d swapped addictions and was now addicted to food. Eventually, I became morbidly obese. Blew up to 326 lbs. It wasn’t until last year that I finally decided to stop being obese. Since then, I’ve lost 90 pounds in just 6 months! And here’s the most amazing thing to me. It wasn’t that hard to do.
A few weeks ago, I decided to start producing weekly “Breaking Free” webinars where you can privately join in on a live conversation I’m leading to learn more about the many topics related to developing sexual integrity and healthy intimacy in relationships. So far, the topics have included:
I’ve had a lot of conversations over the years with couples who are engaged and about to get married, especially with the brides-to-be who are justly concerned about “his porn problem” and are looking for advice on what to do. So here’s a quick list for the brides-to-be of my 7 Porn Problem Do’s and Don’ts, in no particular order, that every couple should consider before strolling up the aisle, for better or worse:
Recovery is a long road. You know it, and I know it. But just think of how long it took you to get to this place. Remember, you didn’t get here overnight. It took a lifetime of secrets and hiding and distorting the truth, of wasted time and lost opportunities. It took you making decisions to forgo what could have been for the lies you chose to believe instead. So what does the road of recovery really look like?